Masturbatory Masochism

Interesting phenomenon. Ways to know when you've gotten too drunk, too high, or too doped up in general. You are laying in bed, staring up at the ceiling in the darkness and fantasies are running around in your head. In most circumstances, masturbation would be in order. However, upon the beginning of the process, you discover that you are too damn drunk/high or whatever to actually finish. In effect, you've just given YOURSELF blue balls.

Then you get up late, have to get to work and realize you have some things to take care of that are much more urgent than usual. Thus, you're even later to work. Any day that begins like that is destined to suck just a little.

I'll let you know how it goes.